I am 36 today, and normally I would probably be getting my nails done to go slay in my new dress at a Happy Hour in DC with a group of friends. However, this typical birthday obviously is not happening due to COVID, but my birthday has still been special. I started my morning off heading to a friends house to help her declutter and we then went on a seven mile walk. She is a widow and now a single mother, but full of so much wisdom. She is one of the many older women I call friend and mentor in my life who have shown me uninhibited love and kindness throughout our relationship. Our conversation on our walk emphasized what my therapist who is also an older black woman told me in my therapy session on the eve of my birthday, BE STILL AND KNOW THAT HE IS GOD. I think I have often set all these “goals” or time tables for my career, relationships, life, you name it. However, I have found myself often chasing the goal and not enjoying the moment and life I have right now.
On our hike, I mentioned to my friend that I struggle with focusing on my failures of the things I do not have. My friend affirmed to me that I have an amazing life with beautiful children, beautiful home, supportive family and friends, an impactful career and so much more. In fact when she said this, I thought to my earlier birthday phone call with my mom and I jokingly told her it is her celebration too because without her I would not be celebrating my birthday and not because she carried and birthed me, but because her and my Dad have always supported me in every step of my life.
After my hike with my friend, I returned home and was welcomed home to a beautiful dessert spread from my children who I am thankful everyday for. It is amazing how these little beings I have given birth to are now blooming into thoughtful adults, and that is one thing I have tried to impart to them that life is not about what it can do for you, but what you are doing for others. Coming home to this thoughtful gesture from my kids affirmed my friends words that I do have an amazing life. My girlfriends also sent lunch to my home for my kids and I.
On this birthday, I have been reminded that instead of chasing the “goal,.” I am going to Be Still and know that God has me right where he wants me to be. I am thankful on this birthday for the amazing life God has given me!
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